Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Fiends Only
Stratford-Upon-Avon, February 26th, 2007 [Reuters] -- Four-hundred-forty-three years after his birth, wordsmith William Shakespeare announced that, from now on, all of his plays, most of his poems ("Except maybe VENUS & ADONIS, which doesn't really reveal much about me") and definitely his will would be "Friends Only." The entire sonnet series "will be friends only from now on and that will never change."
"I never said people could read my will half a millenium after my death, did I?" said Mr. Shakespeare. "What do you care about the second-best bed? You trolls! And they post my picture above every drinking establishment in every Bohemian section of every half-assed burg in the Western World. I never said they could do that. All I can do is only let people who know me read HAMLET. HAMLET, KING LEAR and ROMEO & JULIET represent my personal vision and I don't think half the world should just be able to access them as if I didn't care who read them."
"Don't dare dig the dust enclosed here!" will be the warning at the top of any page touched by the playwright.
"Do you think I honed my words so carefully so that all of humanity for centuries could become intimate with them? From now on, any actor trying to read my lines will have to show himself to me first so I can be sure he's sincere. All the world's a stage in my everlasting humiliation! I have to be select in the future. My writing is my own and death shouldn't be an invitation for just anyone to peruse my every exclamation!" exclaimed the Bard.
"You're just looking over my shoulder," he added, looking over a shoulder.
"I never said people could read my will half a millenium after my death, did I?" said Mr. Shakespeare. "What do you care about the second-best bed? You trolls! And they post my picture above every drinking establishment in every Bohemian section of every half-assed burg in the Western World. I never said they could do that. All I can do is only let people who know me read HAMLET. HAMLET, KING LEAR and ROMEO & JULIET represent my personal vision and I don't think half the world should just be able to access them as if I didn't care who read them."
"Don't dare dig the dust enclosed here!" will be the warning at the top of any page touched by the playwright.
"Do you think I honed my words so carefully so that all of humanity for centuries could become intimate with them? From now on, any actor trying to read my lines will have to show himself to me first so I can be sure he's sincere. All the world's a stage in my everlasting humiliation! I have to be select in the future. My writing is my own and death shouldn't be an invitation for just anyone to peruse my every exclamation!" exclaimed the Bard.
"You're just looking over my shoulder," he added, looking over a shoulder.
# posted by Fredwemyss @ 12:25 AM 
