Friday, December 23, 2005
Somebody Done Changed That Lock On My Door
Well, the lock isn't actually changed, because there previously had been no lock at all, but today I managed to put a sliding lock on the first-floor bathroom door.
This is all the more remarkable because I had to do it twice. Mechanically inept as I am, I went to the hardware store and bought a little lock and a screwdriver. I spent half an hour trying to screw the screws in. They were all tilted at various angles and wouldn't go in any further. The lock was loose. Especially traumatic for me was trying to match an overlayed piece to the holes below. I went to another hardware store and got a ratchet, a vice-grip (which I thought I might need for pulling the screws out, inasmuch as the tops of the screws were stripped) and another screwdriver. These new items seemed tough. I noticed another lock and looked at it. It didn't have a piece which had to sit on top of another piece. I bought it, too. When I got home I took my new screwdriver and easily removed the twisted, bent lock. Then I studied the ratchet. It had six or seven different types of screws in little compartments in the handle, and each of these had a different type of screw on either end. I removed the screw the manufacturer had put in the top, turned the bottom of the handle so as to leave an opening under a screw that I needed and removed that. I put it in the slot at the top of the ratchet. I put it down and took the new lock and held it against the door. I marked the door where the screws would be and placed the tip of the first screw where it was going to go. I took the ratchet, and, using it as a screwdriver, inserted it in the tip of the screw. I began turning the ratchet clockwise. The handle spun, but, it was spinning around the part which I'd been hoping would turn as well. But, having seen my childhood friend Stephen use ratchets in our high school days (which is the reason I even know of the existence of ratchets) I pushed the little corrugated, oval-shaped button on the handle forward and began to turn the handle clockwise again. This time the insert spun as well and, in five minutes, I had each screw screwed in completely and the lock was up. I had to re-adjust the position of the part the bolt slid into, because the bolt just missed it, but that only took sixty seconds. So, the recent problem with my bathroom door, which is that it doesn't close all the way because the semi-triangular piece of medal which sticks out doesn't stick all the way out after the door is closed, is compensated for by the fact that I there's a sliding lock which somebody rattling the doorknob in an attempt to get the door to shut may notice. This means many of the people visiting on Christmas will be able to relax in the bathroom and not worry that somebody will waltz in unannounced.
This is all the more remarkable because I had to do it twice. Mechanically inept as I am, I went to the hardware store and bought a little lock and a screwdriver. I spent half an hour trying to screw the screws in. They were all tilted at various angles and wouldn't go in any further. The lock was loose. Especially traumatic for me was trying to match an overlayed piece to the holes below. I went to another hardware store and got a ratchet, a vice-grip (which I thought I might need for pulling the screws out, inasmuch as the tops of the screws were stripped) and another screwdriver. These new items seemed tough. I noticed another lock and looked at it. It didn't have a piece which had to sit on top of another piece. I bought it, too. When I got home I took my new screwdriver and easily removed the twisted, bent lock. Then I studied the ratchet. It had six or seven different types of screws in little compartments in the handle, and each of these had a different type of screw on either end. I removed the screw the manufacturer had put in the top, turned the bottom of the handle so as to leave an opening under a screw that I needed and removed that. I put it in the slot at the top of the ratchet. I put it down and took the new lock and held it against the door. I marked the door where the screws would be and placed the tip of the first screw where it was going to go. I took the ratchet, and, using it as a screwdriver, inserted it in the tip of the screw. I began turning the ratchet clockwise. The handle spun, but, it was spinning around the part which I'd been hoping would turn as well. But, having seen my childhood friend Stephen use ratchets in our high school days (which is the reason I even know of the existence of ratchets) I pushed the little corrugated, oval-shaped button on the handle forward and began to turn the handle clockwise again. This time the insert spun as well and, in five minutes, I had each screw screwed in completely and the lock was up. I had to re-adjust the position of the part the bolt slid into, because the bolt just missed it, but that only took sixty seconds. So, the recent problem with my bathroom door, which is that it doesn't close all the way because the semi-triangular piece of medal which sticks out doesn't stick all the way out after the door is closed, is compensated for by the fact that I there's a sliding lock which somebody rattling the doorknob in an attempt to get the door to shut may notice. This means many of the people visiting on Christmas will be able to relax in the bathroom and not worry that somebody will waltz in unannounced.
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Stumble Trickney
1) I hurt my left calf last night.
2) I've been stumbling around as if I have a trick knee.
3) There's a poet named Trumbel Stickney, whose work I haven't seen anywhere except in the 1953 edition of THE OXFORD BOOK OF AMERICAN VERSE.
4) I feel compelled to say that with my new limp I should call myself Stumble Trickney, but:
5) I can only call myself this after telling people there is a poet named Trumbel Stickney.
If my calf keeps hurting I'll have to walkney with a stickney.
2) I've been stumbling around as if I have a trick knee.
3) There's a poet named Trumbel Stickney, whose work I haven't seen anywhere except in the 1953 edition of THE OXFORD BOOK OF AMERICAN VERSE.
4) I feel compelled to say that with my new limp I should call myself Stumble Trickney, but:
5) I can only call myself this after telling people there is a poet named Trumbel Stickney.
If my calf keeps hurting I'll have to walkney with a stickney.
Thursday, December 15, 2005
Ang Lee and Annie
I got on the Long Island Railroad train tonight and saw BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN at Loew's Lincoln Center. Hearing that the transit strike might take place in another 36 hours inspired me to do this today. I just don't want to see it with a Long Island crowd. The New York City audience loved it. I think it will be a popular movie, but I don't want to be in an audience of people who find that what is being depicted is alien, no matter how they feel by the time the end credits roll.
SPOILERS, SPOILERS, OVER THE BOUNDING MAIN:
Larry McMurtry has thrown in a little humor, which helps in the translation from E. Annie Proulx's short story to the screen. The story has been opened up, but only in ways relating to things implied in the story. All the key ingredients of the story remain.
When I heard a few months ago that "Brokeback Mountain" was not only being made into a movie, but that Ang Lee was going to be the director, I got the collection WYOMING STORIES from the library and read the story. I had a memory of it appearing in THE NEW YORKER about nine years ago and that I had begun to read it and somehow had put it down and not continued. I gather now that a different story, winding up in the same collection, was in that issue of THE NEW YORKER and that "Brokeback Mountain" appeared in Esquire. In any case, I'd been aware that Proulx had written a story about gay cowboys (and I have to ask the various writers who have said it isn't about gay cowboys, "What do you mean?") and I'd always meant to read it. When I did get a hold of it and read it I mentioned it in passing at a meeting of my book group. To my surprise, when somebody then suggested we read it, the group almost automatically decided to count it as a candidate for our next selection. I always talk about other things I've read, but this time the group was so interested it selected a book (or story within a book) which I hadn't even been suggesting we read. I'm very glad I got to read it before seeing the movie. In the movie, there was a flashback which I'm not sure I'd have perceived as a flashback, even with the face of a character suddenly shown as much older in the scene just after the flashback.
There is a SHAMELESS use of the phrase "the ice storm" in a bit of dialogue. THE ICE STORM, of course, is Ang Lee's absolutely great adaptation of another American literary work, this one a novel also called THE ICE STORM, by Rick Moody. I consider that movie just devastating. The dialogue about an ice storm may be in Annie Proulx's story, but, if you will, sometimes Hitchcock just has to make a more subtle cameo. Nevertheless, Ang Lee has earned the right to refer to himself and it may be that, like McMurtry, Ang Lee felt the story needed some levity.
Maybe I'm not so glad I read "Brokeback Mountain" before seeing BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN. I find I'm not sure how I feel about it. I can certainly say that I think Ang Lee tipped us off too early about what Randy Quaid's character was doing. The short story does it in a short and sweet (short and bittersweet) way. The audience laughed when they discovered what he was up to, but when I read the story I gasped. Of course, as I write this I'm thinking of a very intelligent decision Lee made in his camera use here. I won't give it away, but he avoids a cinematic cliche (most often seen in movies circa 1935-65) while simultaneously tipping us off that something unusual is happening. He updates a cliche, if you will.
There's a scene in Mexico which demonstrates Ang Lee's obsession with detail. We're in a border town and we hear a girl shouting "Chicles," "Chicles." When I was eleven my family was in Nuevo Laredo, just below the Texas border and there were old women selling little, cellophane-wrapped 4-packs of Chiclets gum. They kept murmuring "Chicles," "Chicles." How many people actually know that in Mexico, you hear the word "Chicles" being repeated as you walk along? Ang Lee is at least one person who knows. I'm sure Larry McMurtry could be the person who suggested the detail, but Ang Lee would be the director who asked. I've read that when he made THE ICE-STORM he asked anybody on the set who'd been about twelve or thirteen in 1974 how their bedrooms had been decorated then. Ang Lee is from Taiwan, but THE ICE STORM so perfectly captures the Watergate-era America that I remember that I find it frighteningly real. It took somebody from an entirely different culture to see tragedy in what most Americans see merely as an embarrassment.
Anyway, he has now taken a great short story and turned it into something a lot of people are going to see. The publisher has issued the story as a book in itself. There are actually a lot of books which remain alive because great directors have chosen to film them: THE MALTESE FALCON is a case in point. It should be reiterated more often that, more often than not, books adapted for the screen are good books.
And a high proportion of good movies come from books.
SPOILERS, SPOILERS, OVER THE BOUNDING MAIN:
Larry McMurtry has thrown in a little humor, which helps in the translation from E. Annie Proulx's short story to the screen. The story has been opened up, but only in ways relating to things implied in the story. All the key ingredients of the story remain.
When I heard a few months ago that "Brokeback Mountain" was not only being made into a movie, but that Ang Lee was going to be the director, I got the collection WYOMING STORIES from the library and read the story. I had a memory of it appearing in THE NEW YORKER about nine years ago and that I had begun to read it and somehow had put it down and not continued. I gather now that a different story, winding up in the same collection, was in that issue of THE NEW YORKER and that "Brokeback Mountain" appeared in Esquire. In any case, I'd been aware that Proulx had written a story about gay cowboys (and I have to ask the various writers who have said it isn't about gay cowboys, "What do you mean?") and I'd always meant to read it. When I did get a hold of it and read it I mentioned it in passing at a meeting of my book group. To my surprise, when somebody then suggested we read it, the group almost automatically decided to count it as a candidate for our next selection. I always talk about other things I've read, but this time the group was so interested it selected a book (or story within a book) which I hadn't even been suggesting we read. I'm very glad I got to read it before seeing the movie. In the movie, there was a flashback which I'm not sure I'd have perceived as a flashback, even with the face of a character suddenly shown as much older in the scene just after the flashback.
There is a SHAMELESS use of the phrase "the ice storm" in a bit of dialogue. THE ICE STORM, of course, is Ang Lee's absolutely great adaptation of another American literary work, this one a novel also called THE ICE STORM, by Rick Moody. I consider that movie just devastating. The dialogue about an ice storm may be in Annie Proulx's story, but, if you will, sometimes Hitchcock just has to make a more subtle cameo. Nevertheless, Ang Lee has earned the right to refer to himself and it may be that, like McMurtry, Ang Lee felt the story needed some levity.
Maybe I'm not so glad I read "Brokeback Mountain" before seeing BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN. I find I'm not sure how I feel about it. I can certainly say that I think Ang Lee tipped us off too early about what Randy Quaid's character was doing. The short story does it in a short and sweet (short and bittersweet) way. The audience laughed when they discovered what he was up to, but when I read the story I gasped. Of course, as I write this I'm thinking of a very intelligent decision Lee made in his camera use here. I won't give it away, but he avoids a cinematic cliche (most often seen in movies circa 1935-65) while simultaneously tipping us off that something unusual is happening. He updates a cliche, if you will.
There's a scene in Mexico which demonstrates Ang Lee's obsession with detail. We're in a border town and we hear a girl shouting "Chicles," "Chicles." When I was eleven my family was in Nuevo Laredo, just below the Texas border and there were old women selling little, cellophane-wrapped 4-packs of Chiclets gum. They kept murmuring "Chicles," "Chicles." How many people actually know that in Mexico, you hear the word "Chicles" being repeated as you walk along? Ang Lee is at least one person who knows. I'm sure Larry McMurtry could be the person who suggested the detail, but Ang Lee would be the director who asked. I've read that when he made THE ICE-STORM he asked anybody on the set who'd been about twelve or thirteen in 1974 how their bedrooms had been decorated then. Ang Lee is from Taiwan, but THE ICE STORM so perfectly captures the Watergate-era America that I remember that I find it frighteningly real. It took somebody from an entirely different culture to see tragedy in what most Americans see merely as an embarrassment.
Anyway, he has now taken a great short story and turned it into something a lot of people are going to see. The publisher has issued the story as a book in itself. There are actually a lot of books which remain alive because great directors have chosen to film them: THE MALTESE FALCON is a case in point. It should be reiterated more often that, more often than not, books adapted for the screen are good books.
And a high proportion of good movies come from books.
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Fool's Names
My grandmother (my maternal grandmother is the correct one of the two possibilities here) used to say this to me:
"Fool's names, like fool's faces: Often found in public places."
I notice my name is absolutely huge at the top of the screen.
My grandmother would have noticed, too.
"Fool's names, like fool's faces: Often found in public places."
I notice my name is absolutely huge at the top of the screen.
My grandmother would have noticed, too.
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Welcome, Andrew's Readership!
Found yourself at a strange new blog? This is probably because you read one of Andrew's postings at his live journal on December 13th, 2005 -- in particular, the one in which he suggests a visit here.
Thanks for the mention, Andrew!
Tomorrow I'm going to post about the Ticketmaster Entertainment Rewards scam, which I've just reported to my credit card company. I bought an incredibly cheap McCartney ticket online and MY Entertainment Reward has been to get a little fee from a company I thought had only been sending me spam. And Ticketmaster is either unaware that its services are being used to serve the people at Entertainment Rewards or it is part of the whole thing.
To get the deal on THIS deal, check out:
http://www.entertainmentrewardscam.com
Well, I've gone ahead and posted about Entertainment Rewards, anyway...
If you look at my previous entry, you'll see me tackle the Governator.
Thanks for the mention, Andrew!
Tomorrow I'm going to post about the Ticketmaster Entertainment Rewards scam, which I've just reported to my credit card company. I bought an incredibly cheap McCartney ticket online and MY Entertainment Reward has been to get a little fee from a company I thought had only been sending me spam. And Ticketmaster is either unaware that its services are being used to serve the people at Entertainment Rewards or it is part of the whole thing.
To get the deal on THIS deal, check out:
http://www.entertainmentrewardscam.com
Well, I've gone ahead and posted about Entertainment Rewards, anyway...
If you look at my previous entry, you'll see me tackle the Governator.
Monday, December 12, 2005
Bandwidth Filler
Well, here I am filling bandwidth. Someone out there is being squeezed out of internet space because I'm here posting vapid musings and trivial thoughts.
Well, Schwarzenegger has passed on staying the execution. I have no comment on that but I will say this in response to a TV commentator who suggested tonight that this will have political meaning for Schwarzenegger. I have to agree that it will. It will help him win the Republican nomination in 2008. Between now and that steamy summer the political hacks will work to get an amendment to the Constitution allowing a person not born into U.S. citizenship to become president. When the Republicans pushed to have Gray Davis removed they had higher hopes than installing a Republican as Governor of California. They wanted more than an advocate for the cause. With the Bush dynasty lame-ducked as of the re-election of Dub-a-yah, they needed a shoe-in for the next election.
It's going to be Ah-nold.
Sorry.
Well, Schwarzenegger has passed on staying the execution. I have no comment on that but I will say this in response to a TV commentator who suggested tonight that this will have political meaning for Schwarzenegger. I have to agree that it will. It will help him win the Republican nomination in 2008. Between now and that steamy summer the political hacks will work to get an amendment to the Constitution allowing a person not born into U.S. citizenship to become president. When the Republicans pushed to have Gray Davis removed they had higher hopes than installing a Republican as Governor of California. They wanted more than an advocate for the cause. With the Bush dynasty lame-ducked as of the re-election of Dub-a-yah, they needed a shoe-in for the next election.
It's going to be Ah-nold.
Sorry.
Sunday, December 11, 2005
Richard Pryor
I was looking for something to watch on TV yesterday and noticed that one channel was doing a few minutes on Richard Pryor. It became clear that this was an obituary.
He hosted one of the funniest episodes of the original SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE. Two years later Jackson Browne had a song about his (Jackson Browne's) tour bus. He lists the creature comforts his band has: "We've got Country and Western on the bus, R & B, we've got disco, and eight-tracks and cassettes in stereo, we've got time to think of the ones we love while the miles roll away -- and we've got Richard Pryor on the video..."
It was a long road.
He hosted one of the funniest episodes of the original SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE. Two years later Jackson Browne had a song about his (Jackson Browne's) tour bus. He lists the creature comforts his band has: "We've got Country and Western on the bus, R & B, we've got disco, and eight-tracks and cassettes in stereo, we've got time to think of the ones we love while the miles roll away -- and we've got Richard Pryor on the video..."
It was a long road.
